Pride

Scripture: 1John 3:11-16; 4:7-12

This is a day that many churches around the country—not as many as I would like, but ok some—celebrate Pride Sunday. It’s the Sunday closest to the anniversary of the Stonewall rebellion that began on June 28, 1969 and that Dian described. This also just happens to be the exact day on which the United Church of Christ was founded some forty-nine years ago. I do realize that there are visitors here today who are not connected in any way to the United Church of Christ and the fact that this is our 49th anniversary is no big whoop-de-do. I dare say it’s not a big whoop-de-do for most folks here at Sojourners, including me. Nevertheless, I want to start with the United Church of Christ this morning, specifically with a resolution on marriage equality that was passed last summer, actually passed last July 4, at the national assembly of the U.C.C. called General Synod. I thought we might read that this morning. A lot of people know that the U.C.C. passed a resolution. I’m guessing almost no one has read it. There is a preamble to the actual resolution that consists of some Biblical discussion and some theological comments, and if you are interested in that, it is available on the literature table. The actual resolution though is as follows:

Resolution is read…

I’m sure you know that this resolution has been the focus of a good deal of turmoil and controversy within the United Church of Christ and has earned the U.C.C. a bit of notoriety in the larger society. The resolution has had its costs. Churches have left the denomination. It’s hard to say how many churches. Some left not exclusively and specifically because of this resolution but because of a combination of factors that included this statement on marriage equality. Some left during the years before the resolution was adopted, as similar resolutions were adopted at a more local level, and as more and more gay clergy were ordained into the ministry, or found their way to the UCC from other denominations where they were not welcome, or as scholarships were established for gay seminarians, who it was recognized might have a harder time paying back student loans because they were likely to have a harder time finding a call in the church, especially in larger, better paying congregations. There were other reasons churches might become alienated and leave the denomination, of course, but often concerns centering on sexual orientation and identity have been what people tend to focus on. And for some the resolution last summer was the symbolic last straw, and some of those who had not already left, decided to do so. Some churches have left in clumps, or are considering leaving. The Puerto Rico Conference of the UCC has decided to cut its ties to the UCC. Other groups have organized to be an ongoing opposition movement within the denomination and are making their displeasure felt in various ways, including the always present threat to leave the denomination.

I know you aren’t interested in the details of all this. My point is simply to say that there has been considerable pain in all this, even if it is not visible to us here at Sojourners on a Sunday to Sunday basis. It’s not of course primarily a question of how it affects statistics and budgets. It’s the human costs in terms of feelings of anger and betrayal, in terms of hard words and broken relationships, in terms of mutual respect being replaced in the church by mutual suspicion and mistrust. There is a lot of pain in the United Church of Christ these days. I am directly acquainted with some of it. Some of it may linger at Sojourners, left over from the time of our difficult entrance into the United Church of Christ as an “open and affirming” congregation. Some of it I am just aware of, but don’t have to deal with personally.

So it was a costly decision for the church and one that has been painful for a lot of people in a lot of ways. I want to acknowledge all that and not minimize it or dismiss it. Nevertheless, I also want to say that while recognizing the hard feeling and being aware of more difficulties ahead, I am gratified and grateful that the United Church of Christ passed this resolution. I am proud that my denomination did this. I am proud to be part of a denomination that took this stand. And for me this has a lot to do with the meaning of Pride Sunday, and it helps me think about the significance of Pride Sunday for me, as a straight person.

We live in a time when it is easy for people who believe far out things like that gay people, being human, should have human rights, that gay people being part of civil society should have civil rights, that gay people being children of God should be cherished as people and welcomed gladly and gratefully at every level in the life of the church…we live in a time when people who believe such things can easily feel put on the defensive or find themselves in a kind of defensive posture. Instead of moving forward and trying to figure out how best to have those kinds of values embodied in our laws and our way of living, it seems we are constantly having to try to fend off some new threat, some new restrictive, unfair law or constitutional amendment and count it a victory if we can fend off most of them or the worst of them. The best we can do often seems to be to try to keep things from getting worse or from being as bad as they could be. The idea of actually moving toward where we ought to be on these matters somehow feels too often out of reach. And rather than the burden of proof being on those who for some reason want to restrict rights and make life harder for a class of their citizens, or for instance to explain how it benefits anyone to prevent two people who love each other and want to form a family from being legally married, instead those of us who advocate such things are accused of undermining family values and of trying to destroy the institution of marriage and the burden of proof is placed on us to show that we are not really undermining anything.

Likewise in the church, the burden of proof doesn’t seem to fall on those who want to treat some children of God as lesser children of God, who would deny ordination to a certain class of God’s people, who would not celebrate and bless the love of two people if they happened to be of the same sex. I have to confess that in my mind it’s those folks who have some explaining to do, who should be explaining why passages like the ones from First John that we heard earlier, why they don’t apply and a few other verses, a very few other verses, do. But the reality is, as I experience it, that it’s the rest of us who are asked to justify ourselves. Where are your Bible verses? I’ve got a few right here in my back pocket. Where are yours? And why are you taking these positions that split the church and that clearly show you’re more interested in being liberal than in being Christian? Why don’t you just back off? You Episcopalians, tell everyone you’re sorry you elected a gay bishop. You U.C.C. people take back the resolution you passed for equal marriage and do something that proves you really are Christian after all. People who believe in marriage equality and in fairness for sexual minorities in general are attacked from within our own denominations not just for undermining the family and the institution of marriage, but also for splitting the church and for undermining the authority of scripture, and it is easy to fall into a kind of defensive posture, feeling like it is we who need to explain ourselves, we who need to justify our positions, we who have the sole responsibility of keeping the church together.

I think most of us are aware too that for many people it is assumed that the Christian voice is anti-gay, pretty much no matter what specific issue you’re talking about. I have had the experience of speaking before the city and county school boards on several occasions where people told me afterwards that when I introduced myself as a minister they just assumed that I was going to say something very different from what I in fact did say. I have often said, and will continue to say, that it is important for Christians who affirm the place of sexual minorities in our society and in the church to speak up, to make it clear that the voices that are so often identified as the Christian point of view are not the only voices. I think pretty much everyone involved in the Interfaith Gay Straight Alliance would say that that is one of our purposes, to tell anyone who will listen that there are people of faith from many faith traditions who do stand with lgbt folks and who are not represented by popular perceptions of what the faith community stands for and whose voices also need to be heard. Even this though in a way is a defensive posture. It sometimes feels like a struggle just to be heard, just to edge your way into the conversation, just to be tolerated.

Well, I know a lot of what I am referring to as a defensive posture is necessary and it’s not going to change any time soon. You don’t just change popular perceptions or misperceptions with a snap of the finger. There will continue to be laws and amendments that need to be opposed. Christians and people in other faith communities may feel like their voices are a minority report that may or may not be taken seriously as an expression of their faith. Still, what Pride Sunday says to me this year, and that I feel called to say to you, is that this sense of defensiveness that we find ourselves in by choice and necessity needs to give way to a sense of pride. This may be a fairly subtle thing I am trying to describe here. Don’t know whether you are with me on this or not. And the shift I am looking for and hoping for and praying for is going to be gradual and it may not always be easy even to discern what we need to do, much less actually accomplish it, but we need to be on the lookout for when we are operating out a sense of defensiveness, when our spirits are being defensive, and we need to move, even if it is gradually and with difficulty, we need to move toward operating more fully out of a sense of pride.

And so one of the things I need to say today—you will not be surprised, but I need to say it anyway—is that although I recognize the costs and the hard feelings associated with the equality in marriage resolution that the UCC passed, I don’t want to focus on all of that, or ring my hands about it. I am proud to be part of a denomination that took this stand. I am proud to be part of a denomination that just three years after Stonewall ordained a gay man to the ministry. I am proud to be part of a denomination that has repeatedly taken positions in favor of full civil rights for lgbt people over the last thirty years. I am proud to be part of a denomination that recognized the need to offer scholarship assistance to gay and lesbian seminarians. And I am proud to be part of a local congregation of the United Church of Christ that has said from its very beginning that it would be inclusive and affirming of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered people in every part of its life, in every way, and that we would do this not just by being quietly tolerant or pretending we had never heard of sexual orientation, but by being openly, publicly affirming that this is who we are and who we want to keep on becoming even more.

From this perspective Pride Sunday is not just for gay and lesbian folks. I know it has a specific meaning for lgbt people who have also had to move toward a position of pride rather than defensiveness, so that people don’t have to be ashamed of who they are or apologize for who they are or hide who they are, but can be proud of who they are as people and proud of the lgbt community to which they belong. But it is also important for those of us who see ourselves as allies to the lgbt community to be proud of who we are, not proud as in arrogant proud, not proud as in in your face proud, but also not secretive, not ashamed, not timid, not defensive. Pride Sunday needs to have a meaning for straight people too.

The hymn we’ll be singing in just a moment is called “Once We Were Not a People”. The words make it sound like maybe it’s a hymn that meant to be sung specifically by lgbt people, as indeed it is. Let me give at least the title another meaning though. Once We Were not a People could refer to the idea that we humans, gay and straight, are meant to be a people, not two separate peoples, but a people, with some differences among us to be sure, but nevertheless a people. In this sense we have not been a people, and we are still not, but we need to be moving toward that land where we are. And we need to be doing so proudly, openly, gladly, proud a little bit like a baby taking its first few steps learning to walk, but proud when she does, and encouraged to take another, and then another, and another and another. Blessings to all on this Pride Sunday! Amen.

Jim Bundy
June 25, 2005